He starts talking about his encounter with Harrelson in 2009, as hip-hop blasts from his radio. I'm like, ' Woody, that's assault, that's assault.'"It was Vlad's first meltdown with a star, but it wouldn't be his last. Vlad won't roll down the window."That dude is a leech," says Vlad. Every fuckin' day this cock-blower just runs around, jumpin' on shit. On the side is a logo; the upstairs seats are filled with dozens of bunnies. Vlad started out on his bike when he first came to Los Angeles in 2010, so he treats Dominic semi-nicely, in a Fagin-Oliver kind of way. He told them he'd been attacked, but the home office had other concerns. Like many famous people, Fisher has an intuition about paps and somehow sensed Vlad's presence parked outside. The new law was spearheaded by Halle Berry after being swarmed by paps at LAX last year leading her to scream, "Jesus, what is wrong with you people?Vlad's gone solo since, but at the time he was shooting for TMZ. There have been run-ins with Robert De Niro's driver; Hopper Penn, Sean's son; and Amanda Bynes in the past four years. But his bitch ass will have a fuckin' cow if you jump on his shit." He slips into a decent Cockney accent: "Eh! Luckily, he had another minicam and started filming Harrelson with that. They talk six or seven times a day, trading info on stars who are heading in one another's direction. Soul Cycle class on Sunset where Olivia Wilde and Ashley Benson sweat it out on the bike. She induced a sales clerk to walk out in front of her and even slid in on the passenger side of her car. That's a child here."In January, Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell, the parents of a one-year-old, went a step further, launching a campaign against what they named, regrettably, the pedorazzi, and proclaimed their refusal to do interviews with outlets that use unauthorized shots of stars' kids.
He caught Harrelson and his daughter coming off a flight. Come on, mate, you're jumping my shot."Vlad speaks in his own personal English Esperanto, an oft-obscene language with made-up phrases – e.g., "funky pumper" for a woman's backside – blended through a childhood split between Port-Au-Prince and Flatbush, Brooklyn. He's trying to tell Vlad something, but Vlad talks over him, still pissed off about the Brit."This motherfucker, yo, comes and jumped. Vlad still got the picture."," says Vlad, making a noise that sounds like semiautomatic gunfire. This has confused paps on multiple levels: (1) Who knew Dax Shepard had juice? There's a popular Halloween spot in West Hollywood called Mr. Glammed-up celeb moms parade their children down slides and past face-painting stands, while paps get their shots from a designated shooting pen. There are now at least 35,000 shots of celebs cavorting in Mr. Stars like Matt Damon – who scrupulously guards his kids' privacy – simply don't take them to pap hot zones like Mr. But Berry has brought her daughter there many times.
"I'm asking questions, trying to keep it light. "That picture sold, son, for about 500 bucks." He has an imaginary conversation with Fisher. (2) Many celebs trot out their kids for publicity when it suits their needs. That's her right, of course, but it doesn't suggest she's trying to keep a low profile with her kids."Halle can take her kid there," says Mendoza. That's America."Comically, this is all happening as the world gets smaller.
Vladimir Labissiere sits off Sunset Boulevard in his new black Mercedes E350.
He's monitoring the competition – OK, he's calling them fucking cock-blowers – and talking about the time Woody Harrelson jumped his ass and said he was a zombie.
He is parked in an alley across from the London hotel, one of his favorite haunts.