Just because a player has silver hair doesn’t mean he/she isn’t still a player.
Protect yourself (and yes, women now carry—and offer—condoms.) After the date: Two antiquated rules are (1) The man shouldn’t call the woman until three days have elapsed to avoid looking “too” interested and (2) The woman should never call the man at all.
No doubt real life will be waiting when that moment is up. You could be on the other side of that coin one day. Don’t start doing Conan O’Brien’s, in your head about you and your date. Your date could be a great match for you on paper or, as my mother always says, has all the checks in the right boxes, but if that spark isn’t there, it’s important to accept it and move on. No one likes to be on the receiving end of a Q&A session. Prepare for a first date as you would a job interview. When I explained I wasn’t comfortable having a man I barely know to my home, I didn’t hear from him again until he resurfaced a couple of weeks later, apologizing for his less than chivalrous behavior. For those using online dating, expand your search radius and expand your horizons. People come to where they are in life through their own trial and error.
Enjoy your time with (hopefully) good company (if not, see letter G), and stay in the moment. Unless you believe you are in imminent danger, try to get through the meeting as quickly but as politely as possible. No matter how many dates a person has had, meeting someone for the first time can be nerve-racking, especially if there is an immediate attraction. Careers, children, grandchildren, friends, and social commitments all factor in, and even if romance is not written in the stars, we can always learn from someone else’s life experience. Sometimes it boils down to plain old chemistry, or a lack of it. Ask questions but be a conversationalist and not an interviewer. A pretty face may get you in the door, but a smart woman is the one who keeps the guy from walking out that door. As soon as I agreed, he followed up with a text asking if he could bring said lunch to my house. I have yet to meet the man of my dreams sitting in my own backyard. If I had a nickel for every time a middle-aged man advised me unsolicited that he doesn’t need Viagra I would… Promises of sexual prowess on a first date make me wary, and I can’t help thinking back to high school English when one Lady Macbeth “doth protest too much.” W. No one person is ever at fault in a marriage’s end (except in cases of abuse), and I’m wary of anyone who claims otherwise.
However, when I speak about him to others, I am fair about why our marriage ended.